I moved into my new apartment this Saturday. The first night, I couldn’t sleep. It was too warm. But I spent most of my Sunday vegging out just in my own place. It was nice. I have a good feeling about this. I have a great view of a pine tree from my window. I see it move into the roof of the kitchen and away from the roof when the wind is high. I should probably get renter’s insurance. Either way, I am happy about it. I love the view. I hear people’s conversations because I am so close to the parking lot. I don’t mind. The fact that I am on the second story just makes me feel safe. I can open my window at night and just leave it open.
I feel safe for the first time in three months. I went into my bathroom (which is connected to my room) and it felt good. On my face, I actually put on lotion AND sunscreen. I haven’t done that in months because I kept leaving one or the other in my unattached room. I miss these little things. I took a shower without feeling rushed or grossed out that there was some disgusting disease harbored by one of the tenants. I feel safe. I would like to have a lock on my door, but that will come later. I FEEL like I can actually focus on myself. The silence of the complex makes me feel like I can THINK again.
This is the first step into getting my mind working again.
P.S. I have a pool and jacuzzi. I am excited.